Wednesday, December 26, 2001

like i heard her
backwards saying
i can take one thousand
showers
and never be clean
of course she lied away
she is ten times heavier
stronger, then you found
the grave
or ever was
he's got it down name
you know what i need
who doesn't lie?
you know what i mean
if i'm never in
without you
like you don't know
i am so... angry
i am so... at ease
i feel just like
some great big disease
i think you need
ice water
but the only thing that
you really hate
is all its emptiness
ah, you'll swim
and i will drink myself to
death
if i'm never in
down with you
like you don't know

Truly beautiful. Damn, I'm tired. I'm just a frightfully lazy person. Can you say r E j e C t? Hahaha, sorry... I must add some stupid ghetto humour in. What is there to write.. what is there to write... hmm. Gosh, I'm bored. Whine bitch moan. Sorry.

I'm an emotional eater... which is bad. If I'm depressed/sad/mopey, I eat + eat + eat + eat. If I'm bored, I eat + eat + eat + eat. If I'm nervous, I eat + eat + eat + eat. In fact, the only time I can think of when I don't shove food in my mouth is when I am anxious or content. Although once in a while my nervous-osity will make me un-hungry. Yep. Why do I say this now? Because I'm hungry. I don't know if it's for any other reason that just hunger, though...

Sunday, December 23, 2001

dear, I fear we're facing a problem :// you love me no longer, I know :// and maybe there is nothing that I can do :// to make you do :// mama tells me I shouldn't bother :// that I ought to stick to another man :// a man that surely deserves me :// but I think you do

so I cry, I pray and I beg

love me love me :// say that you love me :// fool me fool me :// go on and fool me :// love me love me :// pretend that you love me :// leave me leave me :// just say that you need me :// love me love me :// say that you love me :// leave me leave me :// just say that you need me :// I can't care 'bout anything but you...

lately I have desperately pondered :// spent my nights awake and I wonder :// what I could have done in another way :// to make you stay :// reason will not lead to solution :// I will end up lost in confusion :// I don't care if you really care :// as long as you don't go


Boy, I'm on a Cardigans trip. Off to Bizerkeley... yay. I'm quite excited!
Why does being under 18 have to suck so much? Fucking hell.

Well, yesterday was semi-interesting. I ate everything in sight. How bliss. Some really weird guy was trying to pick up me + my friends... that was HIGHLY amusing. He followed us out of the mall... oh lord, it was kind of scary, eh? "Are you trying to run away from me?". Uh, duh Some other weird guy also said to me "what? you don't like red blood cells?" as he was listening to a conversation of mine about white blood cells. What a weirdo.

I still love you when the wind blows... been through this before...

[mad dog] God damn, I love music.